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Here’s to Hoping…

April 11, 2012

Dear Baby,

(Yes, it is you I’m talking to! You are mine, sweet angel, all mine and no one else’s. It still feels good to say).

Tomorrow your daddy and I find out if you are a boy or a girl. Everyone keeps asking me what I want you to be. Everyone keeps asking me my opinion.

Can you tell if it’s a girl? 

Any boy-ish feelings yet?

Are you sure it’s not twins?

I just laugh when they ask me. Really, I have no idea who you are, and quite frankly, I don’t have a care in the world about it. I love you already, will love you forever, and can already picture myself screwing up and worrying with a new level of insanity no matter what your gender.

So I’m not really hoping for anything.

Well, except maybe one thing.

I hope you’re like your dad.

Sure, I’m cute and lovable and Lord knows I talk too much, but I feel like those are qualities you will have no matter what we do. There is no preventing the talking gene from developing given the amount of words you hear from me on any given day. Sorry, kiddo, you’re doomed to be a loud-mouth.

I’m hoping for deeper things, better things, more Godly things to take root deep inside your personality. I’m hoping for the things I see in your dad to be the things I see in you.

The funny thing about marriage is that you’re constantly exposed to someone who does the whole thing better than you in the first place. I hate to break it to you, love, but your daddy is way better at being married than I could ever hope to be. He is the one I look to for guidance and modeling and, even though his demeanor is quiet, Godly example.

Your daddy is the most patient man I know – it’s okay, I know you’ll come around in time.

Your daddy is gentle –would it be better to have a little space right now instead of yelling at me?

Your daddy is the hardest working guy I know – sure, honey, I’ve been in a research lab for 12 hours, but yes, I’ll do the dishes too.

Your daddy sees the best in every situation – don’t cry, we’ll get through it. Sometimes Dawson’s Creek has to be turned off (you laugh, but this is a serious crisis).

Your daddy is inexplicably kind – I’ll be at the airport, definitely. No, no I don’t mind if I have to leave the concert early to get you.

Your daddy is talented – insert violin music from our living room.

Your daddy is funny – just listen each day for Mommy’s laughter.

Your daddy loves us – what do you need? Can I help you with anything? How was your day? You are beautiful.

My love, it does not matter to me whether you are a boy or a girl. It does not matter whether you like baseball or tap dancing or poetry or ice hockey (although please could you love the poetry and the tap dancing?). It does not matter what your hair color is, the shape of your eyes, or how many freckles you have.

All I’m asking is that you act like your daddy. Grab hold of his DNA and stick it all over your little body. Listen to his voice over mine and model the type of person he is.

I’m hoping you’re like your dad.

God gave you a really good one.

I’ll love you forever.

See you tomorrow,


One Comment leave one →
  1. pastordt permalink
    April 12, 2012 12:06 am

    Holy crap – I love this writing. I love this writing. I love this writing. Thank you. (And thank you husband, too, for having the great wisdom to marry you.)

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